New: Unchained Melody, by Carling Talbot

ED697B43-6C03-405B-A7AA-56785D583417I don’t use the word “mindfuck” lightly, but Carling Talbot’s debut with Forest City Pulp is a mindfuck of a novel.

Even the book’s very existence takes some explaining. Unchained Melody features characters from cal chayce’s All the Fine Hungers, with permission from cal chayce. The author of Melody’s story in Unchained Melody also appears in the pages of Unchained Melody. Wait, so is that cal chayce? Who’s Carling Talbot then?

Like I said, mindfuck.

It’s not the first time Forest City Pulp books have cross-pollinated characters, and even authors, and it probably won’t be the last. Soon we’re going to need a name for the larger FCP universe. The FCPniverse? Ehhh that sounds dirty.

Anyway, here’s a much better description than my rambling:

When Melody stumbles upon an old manuscript her boyfriend wrote, she can’t help but notice the similarities with her own life. But Sunny never finished the story, so she never finds out what happens to the badass character who may or may not be based on herself.

Sunny agrees to finish the fictional tale of a troubled girl in a world gone mad. But before Melody can read the rest, she comes into trouble of her own: she’s becoming unchained from reality, getting occasional glimpses of another world. To fix it, she’ll need the help of a quirky scientist who’s halfway across the country, and along the way to see him, she’ll combat gangsters, get to know her friends better, and struggle to understand the make-up of reality itself.

Unchained Melody is the authorized sequel (of sorts) to cal chayce’s All The Fine Hungers, where Melody, Sunny, and Chuck first fought elite cannibals. Now they’re struggling against more existential threats, in an entirely different author’s world.

An often meta tale, it would be wise to strap yourself in securely before taking the journey, and hold your god-helmet on tight!

Get Unchained Melody on Amazon.com or Amazon.ca.

 

P.S. You can’t copyright a song title.

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Out Now: Of Moons and Monsters, by P.T. Phronk

The sequel to P.T. Phronk’s splattery debut horror novel, Stars and Other Monsters, is out now. Of Moons and Monsters picks up right where the first book left off, with Stan in a hairy predicament, racing to the last place on Earth he wants to go: home.

Of Moons and Monsters
Of Moons and Monsters rips apart the coming-of-age small-town high school drama in the same way Stars and Other Monsters skewered the romantic comedy. It’s like Never Been Kissed, except with werewolves and lots of people dying in horrible ways.

Learn more about Of Moons and Monsters, or head straight to Amazon to buy the Kindle version or the paperback.

Review copies are available for book blogggers and whatnot. Just tweet me.

New Novel: All the Fine Hungers by cal chayce

Hello. This is P.T. Phronk. I’ve been busy with work and other projects lately, which has kept me away from writing every day. It’s funny what that’ll do to a writer’s brain. Stories itch at the inside of my skull, trying to find a crack to wriggle out of. Fully formed ideas push their way out of me while I shower. Plot holes I didn’t know existed pop open and keep me from sleeping. It’s all quite unpleasant.

Luckily, not all of Forest City Pulp lays dormant while I suffer. Co-founder cal chayce has been hard at work at a new novel, and whoa, it’s quite the novel. All the Fine Hungers is, on its surface, an epic tale of two people tossed into an inevitable collision course. Below the surface, it’s an examination of the terrors of power, privilege, poverty, and how they are maintained over generations. I could describe it as a more horror-tinged The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, but it’s really doing its own multi-faceted thing, in a way only cal chayce can pull off.

Hungers Cover.001

Get it here, or read on for blurbage.

An old man—a monster—with power and privilege beyond imagination, preys on the weak, the innocent, the oppressed. One insatiable desire compels him above all others, and he’ll stop at nothing to achieve it.

A timid girl who fears everything—having struggled since the day she was born against poverty, racism, colonialism, and misogyny—must decide to continue living in fear, or fight for what she deserves.

Each owes the state of their existence to factors compounded by the generations—factors that have left them at extreme opposite ends of the social divide. When they cross paths, only one will survive.

If that sounds like something you’d like, hit up the buy links below. It’s only $3.99ish on Kindle, a few bucks more in paperback, or free in Kindle Unlimited.

Get All the Fine Hungers: Amazon.com | Amazon.ca | Amazon.co.uk

The Arborist: A Horror Novella by the Newly-Rebranded P.T. Phronk

You might notice something different about me. That’s right, I’ve got some new letters in front of my name. I’m now known as “P.T. Phronk” instead of just “Phronk.”

There are a few reasons for the change. Some book stores (like Apple) require a first name for the listing. It looks better on a cover than the awkward “by Phronk.” Plus, for every person intrigued by an unusual single-name author, there are two people who just think it looks wrong and ignore it. So yeah, I’m giving in to the man, but only by two letters.

More importantly, I have a new book out. The Arborist is about a man haunted by a tree. I’ve always lived in cities, but felt that human need to be close to nature, even if it’s just a tree in the back yard. This book explores that urge, and what happens if it’s amplified by a tree that appears in the middle of the night, and is growing far too fast to be an ordinary tree.

I’d say The Arborist falls into the genre of “quiet horror.” If I’ve done my job, you will feel the lurking terror even if you don’t quite see it directly.

I also designed and illustrated the cover myself this time:

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I’m no professional cover designer, but I like how it turned out.

Get The Arborist on Amazon here. It’ll be on other stores soon; links will go here.

Oh, and if you’re wondering what P.T. stand for: nothing. Or many things. Part Time? Permanent Tourist? Phineas Taylor? Playable Teaser? Pug Tits? Who cares.

News from Phronk and Leonard Delaney (The Dirty Cheater)

Phronk here. I’m hard at work on the sequel to Stars and Other Monsters, which, in case you’ve forgotten, is the latest novel in the vampires-and-dogs-and-celebrities genre. The second Other Monsters book is shaping up to take things in even more unclassifiable directions.

A cover reveal and title reveal are coming soon.

In the meantime, Leonard Delaney has been busy. His Minion erotica is now out as an enhanced standalone book, the fifth Digital Desires is an experiment that evolves as you read it, and he’s gotten into current event porn with satire on the ongoing Oregon occupation. A bunch of these are also in a new collection that I designed the cover and print interior for. It’s illustrated and retro and nice, so I’m pretty proud of it. Click below for each of these:

Minions CoverReviews Cover.001Ranchers.001.smallPop_Culture_Value_Combo_V2 

He’s also been running around and cheating with other small presses. New Kink Books is embracing this new wave of bizarro erotica, and has just released Strange Sex 3, a collection featuring some of the greatest bizarro authors out there. Lenny’s story “The Office Photocopier Wants to Fuck Me” is one of his best ever, and included in the collection (as its tag line, in fact). I’m reading the other stories, and some of these are really fucked up, you guys.

Check it out:

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More news “coming” soon. Hah.

New Novel! Victor of Circumstance by Cal Chayce is Out Now

VICTOR_FOR_EBOOK-3Phronk here. I’m incredibly happy to welcome a new author to Forest City Pulp. Cal Chayce brings in some literary punch with Victor of Circumstance, a funny and thrilling small-town adventure. Here’s my take on it:

Like all good satire, Victor of Circumstance is exaggerated, but rooted in reality. The many characters draw from stereotypes, but even minor characters have quirks and depth that bring into question the real-life assumptions that stereotypes rely on. Yet there are clear villains—Donny Gudsen in particular is a cartoonish boor who could nonetheless be found in today’s news headlines.

The story is cinematic in feel, reminiscent of great comedies like Groundhog Day and Vacation. When all of the characters played their part in the meticulously orchestrated finale, it made me want to stand up and cheer.

Victor of Circumstance is funny and touching. Anyone who gives it a chance is sure to have a good time.

Don’t just believe me.

“Brimming with well-observed critiques of modern life, Victor of Circumstance has some laugh-out-loud moments and satire reminiscent of John Kennedy Toole.”
—Mark A. Rayner, author of The Fridgularity

Buy Victor of Circumstance: Amazon.com | Amazon.ca. Add it on Goodreads while you’re at it.

Stars and Other Monsters: New Hand-Crafted Artisanal Cover

Phronk’s debut novel, Stars and Other Monsters, has a new cover! It’s hand-illustrated by the wonderfully talented Keith Draws, who was a joy to work with, and will be back for the sequel (now in progress). I think this perfectly captures the pulpy feel of the book, with all its horrifically twisted classic movie tropes. stars for kindle small Get the newly covered Stars and Other Monsters on Amazon today. The new print version will be there any day now, and it will be available from other book stores early in the new year. Happy holidays!

MOTHERFUCKING WIZARDS by Leonard Delaney: Cover Reveal and Preorder

Leonard here. My new book, MOTHERFUCKING WIZARDS, is out on October 4th. You can preorder it on Amazon right here. Now, you may be wondering, “is Leonard mad at the wizards?” No, I am not calling them MOTHERFUCKING WIZARDS in anger, but out of respect. Next you may wonder, “do the wizards have sexual relations with their moms?” That would have been a clever pun, but no. MOTHERFUCKING WIZARDS does, however, feature some steamy erotic scenes with women who are teachers. Perhaps that will excite you. As will this cover:
Wizards Cover.001Any relations to other books about boy wizards or content in vulgar card games are entirely unintentional. Preorder MOTHERFUCKING WIZARDS today please.

New Short Story: Strangers at a Funeral by Phronk

Phronk here. My new short story, Strangers at a Funeral, is out now. It’s a young adult mystery with some horror sprinkled on top, and ties in with my novel, Stars and Other Monsters, if you know what to look for.

Funeral Cover.001

Brandon notices them at his grandpa’s funeral first: a pair of men in sunglasses who nobody seems to know. They’re not family, they’re not friends, they’re just … there. No big deal, until they show up again at the next funeral. Drawn into a world of funeral selfies and burial crashers, Brandon needs to know what these strangers want from the dead.

Only problem is, nobody gives a crap except him, and his school frowns upon skipping classes to watch people get buried. His sanity can’t take many more funerals, and those bulges in the strangers’ coats probably aren’t concealing anything pleasant.

If you want a little taste of Phronk, buy it for 99 cents or less:

Strangers at a Funeral at Amazon.com

Strangers at a Funeral at Amazon.ca

For those who prefer real paper and sweaty meatspace to this cyber junk, and are in London Ontario (the titular Forest City), I’m working on some live appearances. Stay tuned for details.

Stars and Other Monsters by Phronk: OUT NOW, OMG!

Vampire's Bitch Print Cover 2.001 copy

It’s out! The first full-length novel from Forest City Pulp, and Phronk’s first real novel, Stars and Other Monsters, is now available.

Buy it on Amazon here.

Here’s a blurb:

Stan Lightfoot is the perfect paparazzo. His dog, Bloody, can track down anybody, anywhere, which comes in handy whenever a celebrity involved in a juicy scandal tries to avoid public attention. He’s about to get the perfect picture—a real privacy-invading winner—when he runs into a vampire who ruins his life.

From the dark and vulgar mind of Phronk—author of Baboon Fart Story—splashes a neo-vampire trip through nightmare America, full of movie stars and other soulless creatures, mind-numbing romantic comedies, and a Wal-Mart in every town.

When the vampire reveals a celebrity crush of her own, Stan finds a way to keep her from eating him. Helping a murderous monster screw a movie star wasn’t exactly what Stan had in mind when he got into photography, but it’ll buy him a few days. Can he find a way to escape a creature with god-like power before she reaches her destination?

Probably not.

It’s simultaneously a tribute to and a parody of crappy vampire romance novels. Consider it urban fantasy smothered in blood and skewered with a stake of romance.

You’ve got two options: Kindle and print. Except the print option is actually a bonus-filled mega-option, because Kindle Matchbook is enabled. If you buy the print version, you get the Kindle version absolutely free. United States only, I think; sorry, people actually located in the Forest City.

Go buy Stars and Other Monsters today. It’s pretty good. You, of all people, would like it.